Losing my religion

My grandfather passed away last week.  Funerals are never easy, and for me, it triggers my own grief and loss.  His funeral mass was held in a Catholic church, as that is the faith of my family and what I was raised in.

During the mass the priest went on at length about how wonderful heaven is...I understand he did this as a way to bring our family peace about where my grandfather is now....and frankly maybe he wants us to buy our ticket to heaven by being good Catholics.

But then he started talking about these stories of children dying and going to heaven, and how they were better off.   In one story he said that the child "came back to life" and then said that when asked, the child said he would rather be in heaven then here with his family. I was so angry listening to this. I just sat there shaking my head.  Listening to this sermon, it made me not want to set foot in a Catholic church again.

After the anger passed I just felt sad.   How could it be better for Angel to be in heaven-  that she would actually choose that over being with her mom and dad?  The sermon made me feel more isolated and alone with the feelings of child loss.  I felt that familiar feeling again, like no one understands.   Jeff said later "what can you expect, he hasn't ever had to face this kind of loss." 
It is so true --- this man speaks only from theory, not real life experience. He is not authority on the grief a family feels when they lose a child.
I want my daughter here, not in heaven. Nothing could be better than her in my arms and having her outlive me, in my opinion.