The aftermath

A lot of emotions were brought to the surface for me this week. And it all stemmed from hurtful comments made first by someone that I haven't even met and then by a family member. It is too long and complex of a story to get into here but needless to say I was made to feel guilty, ashamed and less than the people that commented on my loss and the fact that I don't have any living children. I can't even begin to explain how hurtful this was. Scabs over wounds that had started to heal (as much as is possible with a journey that is never ending) were ripped off and a lot of feelings rose to the surface. I am disappointed that I let someone else make me feel so bad...I thought at this point I could deal with the hurtful comments and judgements. I guess not. Funny, the one comment made about not being over the loss of my daughter didn't nearly phase me as much as the rest of it. I guess I am used to that now. To know that people can sit in judgement when they haven't lost their child. The other comments, that insinuated losing Angel was my fault, and I suppose that I am a lesser person than them, left me pretty floored and tears were shed. I am mad that I am giving them the power to affect me but when you hit someone where it hurts most, it is almost impossible not to feel something.

I don't really want to turn Angel's blog into a place for an angry rant but I just cannot help it right now. This whole difficult experience has led to me feeling frustrated and hurt. 

I will always protect the memory of my daughter and my love and feelings for her. Above all else.